life

Well, its been awhile since ive blogged...figured i should in case people are still reading this. :)

Its a very weird time in my life. Im currently at a crossroads in my life. as homestar runner would say "I feel like Im at a crossroads and theres like a Dennys on one corner and an IHOP at the other" not sure what the Dennys or IHOP represent, but probably something very profound ;) Im a college graduate (yeah!) with no idea what to do...i know what my dream/ideal situation would be-1) run off to italy and marry an englishman, learn italian and live like italians (i can do that rather well-trust me, i perfected it last summer) 2-join the peace corps, i know that sounds semi-crazy, maybe it is, but i always wanted to do something exciting and i have this feeling/calling to help people-feel like the peace corps would fulfill that. 3) road trip for the rest of my life, bum around from place to place and see the world.... now none of these are really available to me right now. I lack serious funds. The peace corps probably would be a good idea right after college-but my career is one where i think pursing it immediatly after college is best, since im going to be dealing with people...and their health/lives. dont want to forget anything while im off saving the world (ive been watching way too much "heroes")

now more realistically what i want to do is work as an athletic trainer at a high school/clinic setting. I really do love athletic training, I definatly have a sense of pride in my career choice. its funny how a simple "thank you" from an athlete can really make your day. Ive had that happen-some athletes (you can tell ) honestly appreciate what Ive done (and shown it) plus getting to watch sports for a living isnt too bad either ;)

But people have been telling me how i have all these choices and that the whole world is open to me...thats too much options. I get this feeling like if i dont choose the right job, i'll never get an AMAZING job/opportunity later. which i know isnt true. but its a little overwhelming at times. My sister and i had a conversation about this topic earlier this year. She married a military man while in college, so her location post-college was not up to her. she followed him to where he was stationed and found a job there. I told her how i wish i had that-only one city to find a job in and not millions! and she said she sometimes wished she had more to choose from...its funny how that works. Is it because of our circumstances that we wish we had someone else's decision to make? Would i really be happy if i could only look in a 30 minute radius of a certain city for a job? would i rather have the whole world at my feet? I guess its one of those things you dont know unless you have both options in your life.

In less than a month, i'll be homeless--ok not really homeless, I can always go home. but I feel like i should be independant-on my own. i really want to stay in this area with my close friends. Im not done with them yet :P home is 3 hours away. So if i dont find anything soon-i might be in a cardboard box on green street. id really rather avoid that. BUT getting a job pretty much depends on if i passed the certification exam, which i will hear about any day now-or two weeks from now. and if i pass, interview and get the job. i might not need a place to live here. and i dont want to be locked into a lease if i move somewhere else since the funds are low as mentioned earlier...

thats really it for now. i could ramble on and on...but its late and im beat up from ultimate frisbee...